Kat the Malicious

Beer Level: Journeyman

Blurb: Kat is a young, endearing girl with a penchant for evil and destruction. She enjoys long walks on the beach, in the dark, stalking people. One day while stalking someone the Mystical Beerfish of the Atlantic Ocean came and imbued her with the unyielding craving for non-crappy beer. Since then she has been on a quest to find what can only be described as the perfect beer. Along the way she has come close to success and many times experienced complete failure. Her journey a long and tiring one, she has decided to accept the help of a beer novice, Randy the Magnificent. Here are her adventures.

Top Two Favorite Beers:

• Hoegaarden
• Belhaven

Honorable Mention: The deliciousness known as a Black Velvet, a combination of some form of hard apple cider and Guinness. It could not rank in the favorites since it is a mix of two different beers.

Randy the Magnificent

Beer Level: Novice

Blurb: Randy was just a poor, hapless, photographer when he fell into the trap of Kat the Malicious. One night while photographing some sexy chick on the beach he happened to catch a glimpse of Kat the Malicious being imbued with the curse of the Mystical Beerfish. Never having known each other prior, since that night he started running into her everywhere. Then the night happened when she wove her magical spell of Maliciousness and convinced poor Randy the Magnificent that he wanted to help her on her quest, regardless of the fact that he really didn't like beer. He eagerly agreed because she was wearing a really short skirt. Here are his adventures.

Top Two Favorite Beers:

• Yuengling
• Smirnoff Ice (ha!)

Clay the Corrupter

Cider Level: Journeyman

Blurb: Clay was not much of drinker until his run in with the Mystical Beerfish, one fateful night, when he began his quest. The Mystical Beerfish wove his magic on Clay but then something went horribly wrong. The spell did not take hold due to Clay's twisted nature and had backlash that would reverberate forever; thus Clay found the dark side in hard cider. Clay’s mission turned against the Beerfish and he began weaving his own magic to pull the masses away from beer and bring them over to the dark side. Meeting Kat somewhat hindered his mission. Though they had opposing goals, her uncanny Malicious acts and his unnatural ease of Corruption brought them to join forces to spread chaos and discord through the land of drinkers.

Top Two Favorite Ciders:

• Strongbow
• Magners

Zanny The Enabler

Zanny “The Enabler” is a long time drinker who has always been under the spell of the Beerfish, as his father was entwined with the magical web it weaves in his teen years. Most of his existence Zanny has been on the liquor side of life, since American beers have stricken him with the sickness of watered down, bad taste for far too long. He was brought over to the beer side a few years back with the hopes of having more naked girls. He failed. But, from this magical changeover he did find some foreign, tasty beers and ciders. It is this area in which he collided with Clay. Being an admirer of cider most, he is in search of better and more flavorful ciders. In this path he has also come across some great beers and has incorporated them into his search.

For now….Faith.